Fox News, Fair and Misspelled - FAIL

We would like to thank the reader who passed along the OOOOOPS moment that you see in the picture on the left. Fox 5 News in Atlanta, Georgia aired the graphic to the left on the evening news today. It is not every day that a major news network in the state of Georgia has to spell Georgia correctly! Today, Fox 5 failed!

Of course, we at The Wannabe Guru were intrigued by how someone at a news network could misspell the word Georgia, one of the original 13 colonies. It made us ask a few questions. Where exactly is Georiga? Perhaps I should plug it into Mapquest and find out.


I plug Georiga into mapquest...and boom.... Greggs, GA....no I don't want Greggs, GA, I want Georiga, Georgia (as I guess it is in Georgia since the Atlanta Fox affiliate is broadcasting it)

Let's Google Georiga and see if I get any further:

Well....I guess they are taking graduates from the state of Georgia on a bus trip across Georiga! Sweet....I wonder if we get to ride in one of those big yellow cheese busses!


The lettrist was complaining about $1 billion dollars in aid for a road from Russia to Turkey, but he had to pick on the fact that the Engineers and Georiga Tech spell just as well as the Engineers at Georgia Tech.

Of course, with the record flood that Fox 5 reported in Georiga, it is nice to know that you can make a donation to the United Way of Northwest Georiga (or at least find them on their Facebook fanpage) Question....who do you send donations to for the flood victims in Northwest Georgia?
Perhaps the person at Fox 5 who typed in the graphic for the news went to school at the Georiga Christian Academy?

All I know is I hope that I didn't miss the North Georiga State fair this year, since it looks like it was a really good time last year!

Important French Fry Questions answered!

Below are a series of very important questions about the great All-American food the French (Freedom) Fry.



If you love french fries and vodka, is it wrong to worship a giant Mr. Potato Head?
According to the 10 Commandments: "You shall not make for yourself an idol" So, I wouldn't, but if you want to worship a plastic spud with interchangeable body parts, then more power to you, dude. I guess your name (diablo) says it all.



How do I make a soda can or french fry costume? When I first saw this, I was wondering why you were putting your fries in a costume, but reading on, you want to know how to make a costume made of french fries! Get a cheap yellow sweat suit, a glue gun, and about 16 lbs of french fries (what the average American consumes in a year in fries) and start gluing them on the suit. It could take a while, but I would work quickly before the costume spoils.



Would you still buy french fries if they started calling them fat fries? Yes as long as I can get my supersized-double-extra-large Diet Coke ready to wash 'em down!



Can my pregnant dog eat french fries? What a bitch of a question. Hmmmm. Let me think. (I hate answering a question with a question) Can your pregnant dog chew and swallow? If the answer is yes, then your dog, technically can eat french fries! What a relief that we got that one answered. Oh, wait you asked if it is ok for a pregnant dog to eat french fries. Probably, but I wouldn't advise making it a habit. They say that pregnant dogs may like pickles and ice cream though. What ever you do, please keep your dog away from the girl above's french fry costume.

Did Jefferson actually invent French Fries?

Did Thomas Jefferson actually invent French Fries...and a better question...will McDonald's mess them up? The news yesterday was that McDonald's was going to try to switch the type of potatoes that it uses to make their world famous french fries. So what are some important facts about french fries? McDonald's actually sells about 7% of all of the fries that are eaten in the United States.

So where did they come from, these french fries(Freedom Fries for you right-wingers)??? Who is to blame for the tasty, fat drenched treat that we dip in tomato ketchup that is making Americans fatter and fatter every day.

It turns out that Thomas Jefferson first served them in the White House during his Presidency of 1801-1809. Thank you Mr. President for starting the fat epidemic.

In England they are referred to as chips, and one early references to "Chips" is in Charles Dicken's 'Tale of Two Cities' (1859): "husky chips of potatoes, fried with some reluctant drops of oil."

These chips are referred to as ‘French fried potatoes’ was in 1894 in O. Henry’s ‘Rolling Stones’, “Our countries are great friends. We have given you Lafayette and French fried potatoes.”

Fat (and I guess skinny) Americans eat more than 16 pounds of french fries every year. This comes to over 2 million tons of starch fried in oil! People, try 16 lbs of apples, they are better for you.

and most importantly... Cookie Jarvis holds the record for most french fries eaten in 6 minutes at a whopping 4.46 lbs. Now that is a lot of fatty, carb. loaded goodness!

What is this dude teaching his son? Caption Contest

Father and son contract swine flu after licking tainted barbecue brush!

Photo used under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 2.0 Generic licence


Kevin Lawver of Savannah posted this picture of himself and his son on Flickr.
He claims the that "We were BBQ super heroes, which is why I am holding the grill brush."
Not so fast, Kevin...


Give it your best shot....what is really going on here?

Was is Murder or Suicide? Save the Chicken

In a follow-up story to the our recent Top Reasons to be glad you aren't a chicken, we found this front page headline on the cover of the South London Press: Chicken Addict's Suicide

We were very concerned that someone had taken the question that we found on Yahoo!Answers for "What is your favorite thing about not being a chicken?" to an extreme. Why would anyone actually commit suicide because of chicken? Perhaps it wasn't a suicide at all, but rather a murder, so we decided to investigate. We started with some cows, which have been trying to force the general population to "Eat more Chicken"

Wannabe Guru: Thank you for your cooperation on this investigation. Do you know why I am here today?

Cow A: Moooooo
Cow B: Moooooo
Cow C: silently stands, chewing cud with blank expression on face

WBG: What do you know about this "Chicken Addict Suicide?"

Cow A: Moooooo
Cow B: Moooooo
Cow C: rolls eyes, continues to chew cud

WBG: (I see this is going to be more difficult than I thought, perhaps a more subtle aproach may be more effective) Is it true that you have been involved in Chick-fil-A's heavy handed tactics (marketing campaign) to get people to eat more chicken, thus sparing the lives of you and others like you?

Cow A: Moooooo
Cow B: Moooooo
Cow C: chewing becomes more violent, seemingly more irritated.

WBG: I take that as a yes. Is it possible that one could take said advertising too literally, and potentially eat too much chicken?

Cow A: Moooooo
Cow B: Moooooo
Cow C: (erupting) You got nothing on us man! You can't hang no murder rap on us 'cause some fool decided to eat one too many chicken sandwiches. We ain't talkin'


WBG: Who said anything about murder?

So, I will leave you to draw your own conclusions, but it is safe to say that several chickens are a bit safer today, now that the Chicken Addict is off the street!

Top reasons to be glad you aren't a chicken

So, I am making my evening swing through Yahoo!Answers, and I found this very important question: Jo (the hamster who submitted this question) has already given her opinion on the subject. Her being a hamster and all, we are not surprised by her response, since a chicken egg is almost half of her size. A hamster trying to lay an egg is nothing we would care to see, or even think about!

However, in the spirit of such a great question, I thought we here at the Wannabe Guru, should share with you a few of our reasons why we are glad we aren't chickens!

• We are glad we aren't constantly being asked which came first, us or the egg.
• We are glad we aren't constantly being asked why we crossed the road.
• We are happy to be able to eat a more varied diet than chicken feed. (Mmmm Ice Cream)
• We get to sleep in, in the morning, instead of being forced to lay eggs at 5 am.
• We are not afraid (chicken) to attempt things that we think can't be done!
• We can type with all of our fingers, and not just peck out the keys on the keyboard.
• Chicken noodle soup and Chicken fried rice
  
• When we eat Just Born Peeps, we aren't considered cannibals.
  
• We won't be blamed for the bird flu!
• We are glad to not be constantly thrown under the bus by dairy cows in Chick-fil-A ads begging you to eat more chicken.

Thanks Jo, for such a thought provoking question! I wonder if our readers can think of any others.

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Violent Swine Flu Massacres Greek Words! (perhaps)

As we all know, unless we have been living under a rock for the last few months, the World Heath Organization and news organizations around the globe have been constantly talking about the H1N1 virus. (better known as the swine flu) They say that this Swine Flu virus could reach pandemic levels and kill thousands and thousands of people. They urge us all to take precautions against contracting the virus.

Tons of people are washing their hands more, waiting for the Swine Flu vaccine to be released. They are using bottles and bottles of hand sanitizer to help protect themselves from contracting the Swine Flu. (or any other flu for that matter) People are scouring the Internet for information about the Swine Flu epidemic. Towns across the country and around the world are developing disaster plans in the event of a widespread Swine Flu outbreak!

It is clear that the concern over the H1N1, Swine Flu bug is global, so when we found this question, laden with fear on Answers.com, it sent a sense of fear down our spine! Here is an example of a (potentially) Swine Flu induced, panic-stricken question that shows the major concern in one country, Greece!

If I am reading this correctly, the person, submitting this question is looking for help against the spread of Swine Flu, or some other germ. They must already be stricken with some sort of Germ (perhaps the Swine Flu, or something like it) that has effected their ability to write a logical question. I hope that this person, clearly Greek, since I can only guess that he is looking for what a treatment for Swine Flu (or other disease) might be called in Greek, seeks immediate medical treatment.

I urge anyone who hears a person running through the streets of Athens, Greece (or any other Greek town) screaming this sentence, to quickly move far away from this (potentially contagious Swine Flu infested) individual and put on your surgical masks just as this fine young Greek couple has done!

A winner from brianlululu, What on earth is this?

Brian, Brian, Brian! What on earth are we going to do with you? How can we help you if we cannot understand your question? Brianlululu (which is his screen name) has listed this in the vague category of Homework Help. Now we could take our friend Kirsten's approach to answering your question, Brian:


I like her answer a lot, frankly. Your question looks like one of those trick SAT questions or something, with multiple steps.

Let's see what we are missing. What is your total Gross Revenue for the product you are manufacturing. Right now you have labor and overhead costs, as well as your overall tax burden, (for the product) but I have no idea what it is your are using your labor for (or your overhead expenses, for that matter)

What I want to know is what is it that you are manufacturing. I wonder if you are making self-closing nose rings for our friend Audrina. What kind of widgets is he making at this factory?

The next question I have is about the wages that you are paying your employees? According to your problem 70% of your $200K for labor costs was for direct labor. ($140,000) Your problem then says that you used 20,800 labor hours....which comes out to paying your employees $6.73 an hour. Effective July 24, 2009, the federal minimum wage increases to $7.25 per hour. You sir are breaking the law in this word problem.

You must be running some sort of widget making, sweat shop! (and you must be stopped) If I were you, I would tell the teacher, who assigned this problem that you can't do it because it is unethical.

Nose Piercing Question (I think)

After much thought (actually about 5 minutes of thought) we here at The Wannabe Guru have decided that it might be more fun to take a less serious approach to answering the questions that we find on Yahoo! Answers. We will continue to strive to answer the difficult questions to the best of our abilities!

Our first question comes from a girl named Audrina. Since Audrina has no avatar I imagine Audrina looking something like the woman on the left. (a woman with a nose ring)


Here is Audrina's question:




I am not so sure that I understand this question, Audrina, but I will try my best. First in order to answer your question, we should dissect the question. I know what a nose is. (not much of a problem there) I had to consult Dictionary.com to find out what a "Percing" was. This is what I found:

No result? What am I to do? I will assume (from reading a little further) that your question refers to a PIERCING. Reading a little further...

If you take a nose ring out (Take the ring out of what? Out of a bag? Out for lunch? Not quite sure here, so let me read on) after 2 and a half months (so maybe we are dating this nose ring. Perhaps the nose ring is symbolic for something or someone else. I am thinking that the nose ring is a person who has a nose ring, perhaps Audrina's friend.) after you got it (the swine flu, perhaps?) will it close up (the ring?)

Well Audrina, let me help you here. The ring will close back up if, and only if, it closed up prior to your putting it in 2 1/2 months ago. As far as your nose (which I think was the real question) you will have a scar.

Anyone else have a better answer for our friend Audrina and her PERCING situation?

Birthday gift help!

charlieg writes:

I need birthday gift help!?

My girlfriend's birthday is a few weeks away, she is turning 19, she goes to college in new york and i go to college in texas, thus we have a long distance relationship. I am going to send her flowers and a letter, but i need to send her something else as well. I just have no idea what else to get her. we are not a very material based relationship and rarely do gifts, but i really want to get her something nice. suggestions please.


Well Charlie, I hope that we can help you with some ideas for a special gift.

• You could give her the gift of a college sweatshirt from your school. Since it is considerably cooler in New York during the winter months, she will get some use out of it, I am sure.
• The gift of good chocolate! (read, not cheap chocolate) Find something different from a local candy story in you town in Texas.
  
• Some local Texas food. If she likes spicy food, then salsa might be the thing the spicy gift she would love.
  
• A unique stuffed animal could be a fun and inexpensive gift!
  
• Something that you spend the time and make by hand can be a very special gift. If you have carpentry skills, this might just be the thing that shows that you are committed to spending time for her.
  
• A video or photo montage of your time together is another fun gift. Girls like a sentimental gift, and it will mean something to her that you spent time working on the gift
• of course if you have a bigger budget, a plane ticket for her to come see you (or a plane ticket to go see her) might just do the trick...just don't show up unannounced, wearing just a bow, and holding those flowers, or you might be in for a response that you don't want!
  

I hope that this helps. I wonder if our readers have any other great gift suggestions for charlie

Five good ways to eat cucumbers

Peaches asks: What's good with Cucumbers?I would assume here that we are talking about what foods are good with Cucumbers. Here are five ways I like to eat cucumbers.

• I like cucumbers in a simple salad with tomatoes, oil and vinegar, and oregano
• I like cucumbers dipped in ranch or blue cheese dressing
• I like to eat cucumbers that have been pickled
• I like to eat cucumbers as part of a dilled cucumber dressing
• I often have cucumbers on my subway sandwich

I wonder if you ask this question because you have too many cucumbers in your home garden and have run out of ways to serve them. I have also seen cucumbers served with fish and baked, curried, and stuffed. I am sure there are several great ways to prepare cucumbers! I am just happy to have them in a salad or a dressing personally!

Dirty Text Message Makes Guy Freak Out!

So I just read a question on Yahoo! Answers , and I thought that it was a good one to respond to. Lily writes:

Boyfriend freaked out over dirty txt msg?

My bf is away at school until Dec. we were chatting via txt msg last night, and when I kicked it up a notch he freaked out!! I didn't say anything perverted or sketchy... But he went off saying I was "thinking nasty" and he wanted a solid relationship with me before anything happens!! We have not had sex yet... but I thought that's where this was going!! Hes 24 and not a virgin... Hes in his grad school this year, which he has asked me to move out there with him. I just think its so strange that hes freaking out over a playful txt msg???


So, let me get this straight. He is off at GRAD SCHOOL, he's 24, and not a virgin, and didn't like getting a "dirty little message" from his girl friend back home? Something seems to be up here and I think I might know what. It sounds like one or more of the following is happening:

• He really only sees you as a friend, and doesn't want to have THAT KIND of relationship with you.
• He is gay, or has recently figured out that he is gay.
  
• He has a girlfriend at school (who prob. reads his text messages) and doesn't want to have to explain to her about the girl back home.
• He is trying to string you along so that he still has someone to hang out with at home.
• He could actually be a stand-up guy, who actually has his head screwed on straight and is not going to take advantage of someone, especially you, who he considers to be a friend.
• Perhaps he is the shy sensitive type and is at a total loss of words as to how to react.
  
• He is a prude. (it is good to find things like this out at some point)
• He is just flat out dumb. What guy doesn't like a good "dirty text" every once in a while?
  

In my opinion I think it may be the first one, where he sees you only as a friend. (which isn't a bad thing) I think it is his way to not screw the relationship up by adding sex to it. Who knows, it could grow into something more down the road. Let's hope so!

"I love you" or "love you," much difference?

So.... scouring Yahoo! Answers, I found this question from wabba*pet. :x
It reads: Is there a difference between "I love you" and "Love you"?

Technically no, Wabba, there is no difference between the two, as they both say that you "love" the person you are talking to, and the 2nd one implies the word "I."

Ok...now that I have gotten that out of the way...here at Wannabe Guru thinks that there is a difference. We think that "Love you" is much less formal than "I love you." To say "Love you" is almost like saying "Love ya, man!" which implies that I love (or at least in the moment, really like) something that you have done or something about you. Love you, being much less formal is perhaps said in passing.

I love you, however is a declaration of love. I (and only I at this very moment) love you is something that you say very directly to a person. By sticking the word "I" in front of love you, the person saying it is trying to make a point, and is making it very clear to the person he or she is saying it to gets the point that they are loved!

I hope that helps! What does everyone else think?

Two Career Marriage, ways it can work

The days of Ward and June Cleaver are over. Ward goes to work, and June stays home cooking, cleaning, and looking after the kids. In today's fast paced world, often both spouses are working. Here are 4 ways that your marriage can work when both spouses have great jobs.

1. Both partners in the marriage are equal and share responsibilities equally. Clearly the careers come first for each. Often household tasks are done (or put off) jointly. One caution with this type of equal sharing of responsibility is that each partner cannot allow their competitive nature from work slip into their personal, home life.

2. One partner in the marriage takes on a lesser, subordinate position in the marriage. This often happens when someone marries his/her boss. The work relationship carries over into the home life. One problem here is that if the roles in the relationship can cause stress in the marriage or relationship.

3. The marriage partners' personal emotions supersede their career drives. The marriage partners often sacrifice business opportunities to spend more time with their spouse. Of course one drawback here might be that one or both of the marriage partners may end up using their marriage as an excuse for their not succeeding at work.

4. The 4th (and perhaps best) way to achieve a solid and healthy balance between work and marriage is for the spouses to be ultra-aware of their partner's needs and constantly move toward each other. The devoted partners support each other, and celebrate each other by being devoted to their partner's career and personal happiness.

Any of these four arrangements can work, though they are not for everyone. Both marriage partners must be satisfied with the relationship for it to work out. The partners must make personal adjustments and jointly discuss with their husband or wife to make the relationship work!

Tell me how do you make your marriage work when both spouses are working on their careers?

Ten good reasons to write a blog

I am sure that there are several great reasons to write a blog. Let me see if I can list ten good ones right off the top of my head:

1. It will sharpen your writing skills if you write every day. Who knows, you might might even become a decent writer.

2. You could become famous, like other bloggers. I can't name any famous bloggers, but I am sure that they are out there somewhere.

3. Of course with fame comes money. You could blog to be rich. You could get really rich, really slowly, by writing once a week, or once a day, or once an hour!

4. You could meet some cool new people. You might even get some people to your blog. It would be cool if people subscribed to this blog!

5. You might make a difference in the world. I am not quite sure what this difference will be, but I think it would be really cool if you did make a difference to someone in their life.

6. You can write a blog to kill time. (not that time has ever done anything to hurt you) This will be better time spent rather than twittering or completely goofing off.

7. You can write a blogs so that your can have a voice. We all want to have a voice from time to time, so a blog gives you a forum to have that voice.

8. It's hip to be a blogger. Everyone is doing it. Tila Tequila had over 1,000,000 subscribers to her lame blog. I can't say that I will have that many subscribers, (nor will I stoop to the level of skanky women) but two or twenty who read my blog would be cool.

9. You want to blog in a way so you can can build a following using social media like Twitter or Facebook. Social media is NOW and I think that many bloggers miss the boat when it comes to networking on social media.

10. Blogging is fun!

So there you have it....that is my list. I think it is a good start from right off the top of my head. I want to know what you think. What are some reasons that you blog?